Last minute, I've come up with many gifts from the heart (some of them the best gifts of the whole lot. It's amazing what we come up with under pressure!)
Family gathering ground rules: Adapted from Romans 12:9-18
I wrote this for a Thankgiving presentation to a group of mothers of pre-schoolers. It would apply to most family gatherings. Peace.
Be truthful to your heart. Love must be sincere.
Guests will not badmouth or beat on each other. Hate what is evil; Praise kids and adults alike for clearing the table and using their manners. cling to what is good. Keep your eyes off your spouse’s hot cousin. Be devoted to one another in love. Let your spouse have the last of the coveted apple pie. Honor one another above yourselves. Keep the laughter loud, but kind. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Don’t throw cold water on junior’s dream of designing the first rocket-powered skateboard. Be joyful in hope, Be patient with Aunt Edna’s ever-recited list of aches. patient in affliction, Say more than “Rub a dub dub, Thanks for the Grub, Yeah God.” faithful in prayer. Take a plate to the fellow across the street who worked all day and came home to an empty house. Share with the Lord's people who are in need. Better yet, invite him over. Practice hospitality.
Give blessings to your relatives even as they criticize how you discipline your kids. Bless those who persecute you; Offer up your children to them for a weekend. bless and do not curse. Cheer loudly when your niece tinkles in the potty in the middle of dinner. Rejoice with those who rejoice; Cry with your sister whose husband’s in Iraq. mourn with those who mourn. You’re all a bit different, but try to get along. Live in harmony with one another. Remember that we all put our undies on one leg at a time, whether they’re Victoria’s Secret or Hanes Her Way. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Don’t feel the need to flash your thong. Do not think you are superior.
If your brother flings a pea from across the table, don’t return the favor with a spoonful of mashed potatoes. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Serve turkey, not quiche. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. Give all the children the same size dessert helping. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
*(ZFB= zit for brains)
Earlier this month, I ventured to the Naturopath to see what wisdom she could impart regarding my health.
She took great care and more time than any of the doctors thus far. She was not at all dismissive of my symptoms and very thorough. Did some pretty unique tests on me (two kinds of body temp- oral and armpit, took blood pressure on all four limbs, read my retinas…) and I’m now minus a fingernail clipping and a sizeable lock of hair that will be tested for all kinds of biochemistry. Results on that come back after the holidays. Oh, and she made me stick my tongue out at her. I think that should be protocol for all appointments. Esp with accountants and lawyers…
She had so much information that I left with a head ready to explode from options. The body is one complex machine, I tell you. I know more about its function (and malfunction) than I ever cared to know.
Sometimes less is more. It’s like when I worked in the cellular phone industry. How do they work? FM… flippin magic. Okie doke. I’m good with that.
Stress is most certainly a factor in my symptoms. Some people say, “whew, that’s a relief!” I couldn’t disagree more. What I’ve come to realize is that stress compounds in the body over time (like most toxins). I always thought I was “handling” my stress quite well due to my high level of function through adversity. These physical symptoms have told me another story.
Somewhere along the line, at one of the times that I had enough stresses to break the camel’s back (so to speak), my body got depleted of the chemicals needed to rally through such a crisis. The next time it happened (and I’m not talking about stress like, “damn, they don’t have my flavor latte AGAIN!” I’m talking about divorce, abuse, estrangement, job loss, marriage, pregnancy, entrepreneurship, death, money issues, moving, pneumonia, audit, family discord… and sometimes several during one period of time) my body was even more depleted.
One thing all the doctors can agree upon is that my hormones are now out of balance. The endocrine system is way complex. It will be a while before we figure out the hormone that is at the crux of it all in order to right it.
I tried the medical “quick fix” of taking synthetic hormones and decided after two weeks that I loved my family too much to make them endure another day of “witch woman.”
So for now, I’m taking a supplement to keep my immunity up. I’m doing my best to ignore the “icicle” feeling on my head and doing what I can to stop and meditate on the moment.
I’m a testimony to what I tell my clients. Self care is important. If you ignore the needs of the self long enough, your body will rebel.
Slow down, be quiet enough to listen and take care.
I gave this as a gift to a girlfriend's family (of all girls, like mine), but this game can be the "Stellar Sibling Kindness Game" just as easily. I used cookie cutters and craft foam for the stars, stacked three different sizes of stars together with Elmer's and then attached the whole lot to a clothespin. Last, but not least, I put a magnet on the back of the clothespin. Oh, make sure each star has a unique marking so you can distinguish between them.
It’s the Stellar Sister Kindness Game!
We know how you like a little sisterly competition… so here’s a fun game you can play year round. We made you each a star magnet that will hold your “acts of kindness” on the fridge.
When you get caught doing something kind for your sister, she gets to rat you out by writing your kind deed on a 3”x 3” square of paper and tucking it in your star clip. The first sister who has enough “acts of kindness” to cause her star to plop off the fridge… WINS! When you find you need other rules or regulations, have Mom and Dad help you work them out together. You may also want to decide what you get for winning!
Get sneaky and creative with your kindness! Make a bed, set a special breakfast out on a busy day, pick up a room, do a chore that’s hers, paint a picture, give a back massage, carry her stuff, hold a door… you get the picture!
Have fun!
So I wonder what would happen if we all played ever day?
What do you think?
I never had an advent calendar as a kid. I decided to make one for the girls this year. I didn't really know what I was doing, so I made it up.
In November, I sat down with my eldest and explained that we’d be giving gifts from our hearts this year. “Doing” gifts and “being” gifts. If we gave stuff, it would have to be made from supplies we already have on hand. (And we’re pretty blessed with “stuff on hand,” to be sure.)
“Think of things that would warm someone’s heart.” She and I brainstormed a list of a couple dozen acts of kindness that would do just that. I made a tree out of craft foam and we made round ornaments out of construction paper and wrapping paper. I numbered them from 2 – 24 and then wrote an act of kindness on the back of each one.
Each day after breakfast they take turns taking off an ornament. After work/school, we do what it says. Last Friday, we rang the Salvation Army bell in front of WalMart for an hour in 8 degree weather. Yesterday, we wrote letters of thanks to recovering soldiers. Today, we’ll each choose 6 stuffed toys to give away. (Yes, me too. I still have virtually all of mine, but I’ve just hidden them amongst the girls’ toys.)
Over the weekend, we made my great aunt cry. (I know, that hardly seems kind.) The girls called her and sang Feliz Navidad. Then they followed up with an unexpected (and LOUD) Jingle Bells. My youngest told her all about our new “activity” scene “with the baby Jesus and EVERYTHING.” And my eldest told her that Santa can’t cancel Christmas no matter how bad it snows. You just can’t cancel a birthday.
My aunt’s heart was warmed over and over, so much so, her eyes had to leak. I’m so proud of them for taking this on with gusto.
They keep thinking of things that aren’t on the ornaments. We need a “leftover list” so we can keep up with the game on into January. Loving generously shouldn’t stop when the tree is empty. The star at the top (#1) should remind us to think of a new kindness every night… hmmm… I smell a new game!
Merry Christmas!
