Day's a Wastin'

I’ve been immersed in the Twilight saga. (Started Eclipse last night!) Reading them has reminded me that I was once dead set on becoming a writer for teens. The author has reached two distinct audiences (teens and say, the 25-45 crowd?) with such gripping passion that I’m in awe.

It’s evoked so much in me that I’m often just standing there, dumb, with my mouth and eyes wide open… wondering. I wonder about my life, my past, present and future and pictures vividly flash before me… memories I haven’t thought about for years. I’ve had so much “head down” time with kids and muttling through that I’m excited and fearful at once that I just might be waking back up.

I looked at my girls last night… My eldest was teaching her sister something on paper, her air-dried pool hair draped around her face in perfect waves. My youngest looked up and smiled at me all the way to the corners of her eyes… they were being kind to each other. I was struck…

“Wow, are you amazing and adorable!”

How is it that I often don’t see? I’d just been in a rage about them losing the “wet hair comb” (it’s a curly hair thing…) not fifteen minutes prior. It wasn’t about them. It was about nothing being where it should (including me)… it was about too much change… it was about overwhelm. They were so forgiving. What kind of mess am I these days, I wondered? Such a mess that I can’t see what IS.

This is what I call an “ah ha” moment. I’m noticing (again!) just how very simple it is to slip out of the present and let the beauty in my life slip by without my noticing. It’s like waking up and finding that it’s noon on a gorgeous day.

Time to wake now. Day’s a wasting.