The Roller Coaster - to ride or not to ride?

Every so often, each of us will step on to an emotional a roller coaster. We know what it's like... going up with wild anticipation and then plummeting to the bottom (leaving particles of yourself at the top) only to fly back upwards again and then round and round. How often do we get back from this trip affected, but pretty much at the same gate we left? We may be enlightened, elated or relieved... but we're back nearly where we started... deciding which direction to go next.

We know what our own roller coasters do for us, but what about when we get on someone elses?

It may be a friend who enters an unhealthy relationship, or a spouse who falls into a pit of self doubt or a co-worker who picks up an new gripe that's all-consuming. Whatever it is, their roller coaster can seem either so dangerous or so inviting that you just have to ride along.

Riding others' roller coasters, I've been compelled to get angry with my loved ones. I've been drawn into fights that weren't my own to fight. And I've taken on stresses that would best be served and worked out without my taking part. I've ridden lots of emotional roller coasters that simply weren't mine to ride.

I used to think it was healthy, or empathetic or supportive. I recently realized that it's not always so. Sometimes the best support I can offer is to watch from the ground, wave at them as they laugh and scream and be ready at the exit gate with steady footing (or a barf bag!) and let them lean on me while they absorb the ride.

Whose coaster do you need to step off of?